Words cannot do justice in expressing how much I miss you.
Everywhere I turn, every song I listen to, everything I do, reminds me of you and the times we have spent together. Being with you has been the happiest time of my life. And I seriously doubt anything else can surpass that kind of elation.
After talking to two of my best pals, Weimin and Jackson, on separate occasions, I have realised my flaws.
I do not wish to give excuses. But I want to make clear certain things. Life is short, let's not let any misunderstandings get in the way of an happiness. Yes, it is true I have a temper. But as I always say, I didn't ever flare up at you nor lost my temper with you. However, my pals told me something that I realised. Something I couldn't have realised before anyone told me. The fact remains even though I didn't lose my temper with you, losing my temper at all with anyone or anything in your presence would have given you stress due to the tension that is existant in the air at the time. And I completely understand that now. You said before you were stressed to see me angry, and it doesn't matter that I wasn't angry with you. Now I fully understand. If ever I get a chance to relive my 4 months with you, I would definitely have done things differently.
Another thing that I have told you also, I know now that I tend to fight and debate my case too strongly. And at times, you may not be able to express yourself about the things you want. And for that, I have already changed.
I also realise that you are one independent lady. You know how to take care of yourself. I know I tend to want to take care of you and care for you in the most minute of things and at times, you will find that real bothersome. I didn't understand why before, but I do now because you are independent. And all independent persons will hate to have that taken away from them. I know that perfectly now because I would hate to have my independence taken away from me as well. And I love you for being so independent, which is so rare in ladies.
All I want to say is, all these would have been prevented if we have better communication. I want to change, to be a better man for you and ultimately also for myself.
I know I can do it. I have already done the things that I have told you I would do. You said you want to go home often and I have not prevented you nor create any fuss ever since. You wanted time alone, I gave you time alone and I didn't even want to bother you by contacting you. But I was concerned for your safety, which as mentioned above, I shouldn't have either.
I miss you terribly. I just wish for a chance to re-date you. For you to see for yourself that I can be the man you wish me to be. Give me the chance to give you the happiness you desire. I really don't think I can love another person. There may be prettier girls, there may be girls with stronger personalities, but there is no one else like you. And I can't love anyone else like I love you.
Please consider giving me the chance to date you again, that's all I hope for. No commitments, no demands, no expectations. Just starting afresh.
My name is Alvin Tham. May I date you?
I miss you so much, so much, soooo much.